Every second counts…

I look back on the times in my life when I thought I was busy and laugh… Even though I was busier than most people at the time, it pales in comparison to my life now. I feel like I am trapped in an Edgar Allen Poe story. I remember reading one in high school about a guy who hears a heartbeat thumping away (guilty conscience). My day is filled with the imaginary ticking of seconds on a clock. From the start of my day at 6:15am until the end of my day at 3:00am, every minute is accounted for right now. I have more to do than there is time to get it done. If I am driving from the kid’s school to my job at Ft Carson, a mere red light creates tension. When they offered me the Project Engineer job, I explained that I take my kids to school and I cannot arrive at work until 8:20 or 8:30. They agreed, but everyone else arrives at 6:30 or 7:00am. I don’t like showing up when everyone else has been hard at it for an hour or two… If I get stuck behind someone at a stop sign who refuses to pull out unless the road is clear all the way to Eastern Kansas, my blood boils. If I wind up in the line that takes longer than others at a store, I think of the several minutes that could have been used elsewhere. I sometimes have to decide on the way to Intel if I am going to grab some dinner and be 10 minutes late, or skip food and show up on time, but have my stomach growl for several hours. As hard as this is, it is good for me to experience. I have always valued my time, but the last several months have taught me to GUARD my time and to be efficient in everything I do. Every minute of distraction I allow is a minute that something important is not getting done. Or worse, every minute that cuts into my time with Tracy, Josh, Jonah, and Ethan is agony. There is no time to do things over, and there is no time to leave things partially done and get back to it later. This is only temporary and it will get better, but it is hard right now.

I must go now… the tick-tocking in my head is getting louder…
JD